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Thursday

June 14, 2007

I was standing at the sink brushing my teeth this morning running through a list of things to write about and it became a list of my week thus far.

My sample sale and dinner night last night, walking back to Union Sq. feeling like I fit here.

Booking my spa day on Sunday, why I booked it, how I feel about it, etc.

Taking the time to soak my feet and exfoliate them a couple of nights ago but staring at my eyebrows every morning and night for the last week thinking how I have to pluck them and not doing it.

That last night I had to yell to Matt to come into the bedroom to kill a bug I saw, when if I was living alone I would have just gotten it up and done it myself.

Noticing the little routines I’ve started like, packing my gym bag each night, putting my clothes on the bed when I put on my sleep clothes, but only putting them away when I come in to actually go to bed.

How much fun I had spending all day Saturday in the park and how calm and light I felt walking back home along 5th later that day.

How with all of that sometimes I still feel like I’m just kind of floating through and not really living here. Like, is this it, am I living in NY? I guess its only been 3 months, but sometimes it still doesn’t feel real to me, and yet when I look back on the list made up of just this weeks doings and thoughts, I am living here, this is my life now, those are my daily routines, and my comings and goings and how I’m living. This is it.
I mean its not IT, but I’m here, I’m doing it. Maybe I’m still in the adjustment period of the change, maybe in another few months it will really feel concrete and real, maybe not. I don’t know if I really prefer it either way, cause I’m really happy and having a ton of fun and I don’t think that will change either way and I do think that that is really what matters.

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