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A Month

July 26, 2010

It has been about a month since I posted.  There has been so much I wanted to say and talk about and get out.  I’ve been holding it in.  I need to stop holding it in so much.

There’s a baby growing inside of me.  I kind of can’t believe it still.  It is so much more real now than it has been in the past month, mostly because now I can freely talk about it, but also because I have the tell tale bump.  Finally.  I’ve been wanting the bump, lusting after the bump and now I have it.  And now I feel huge.  But I am embracing it, not fighting it.  For the most part, anyway.

In January of 2011 I will have a baby, I will be responsible for another being, I will have a child that will grow up and be my age some day.  That’s crazy, man.  It is one of those things that you can’t think about for too long or your mind just goes in circles and circles and circles and you don’t know how to get back out to normal, rational, everyday thought.

There’s a lot to think about, a lot to plan for, and a more than small part of me wants to curl up in an air conditioned room with a blanket and some ice cream and forget about it.  If I’m honest with myself a lot of comes from the missing pieces in my life, the largest one being my Dad.  But that’s a whole other post.

A lot of other things have happened in this past month.  We all grow and change immensely in a month’s time if we really think about it.  I’ve taken on more and more at work.  Relationships have strengthened, people have grown up, visits have happened, fireworks have been set off.

Now that I can share more, I’ll be back more, I promise!

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Elisabeth permalink
    July 26, 2010 1:57 pm

    Welcome back! You’ve been missed 🙂

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